Thursday, July 17, 2014

Even on the days I freak out...

God is still pretty good to me.



It's funny how some days are just super stressful...even when rationally...they really aren't.  It's the emotional equivalent of a bad hair day...everything is just harder and doesn't sit right.

Yesterday morning I woke up late but really early as I had stayed up til 4am the night before in order to prepare my body to work a night shift.  This backfired as I ended up waking up before ten and getting less than a normal night of sleep.  I also woke up stressed as I hadn't heard back from the friends who had promised to help me remove my old living room furniture and pick up my new stuff (this happened to be one of only 6 days of the month the dump is open in our town to drop off furniture) with their truck.

I got out of bed, found my phone, and saw a text message from them canceling.  I called the furniture place and found out it would cost upwards of $200 to have my old stuff removed and the new stuff delivered...and also that I wouldn't be home for their available delivery dates until August 29th!  Already tired and in a weird-freak out over every little thing-stressed out mood I texted my (mother of 8 children under the age of 9) sister, trying not to sound like I was in a tired and weird-freak out over every little thing-stressed out mood...asking if she could come over and meet the delivery people if I had them come on a day I was working (but much sooner than the 29th).  I received a VERY hesitant yes...which is completely understandable because who wants to hang with 8 little kids in someone else's not kid friendly house for a couple hours on their Friday afternoon?

I think I forgot to mention at this point that I was pretty annoyed with God.  My weird-freak out over every little thing-stressed out mood didn't help and I found myself calling out to him, "Well if you're not going to send me a husband to help me with these things, you could at least provide a friend or two to help..." because in my weird-freak out over every little thing-stressed out mood I immediately jumped to the conclusion that since one friend had cancelled on me at the last minute I now had ABSOLUTELY NO ONE IN THE WORLD TO HELP ME.  And then I decided, if I had nothing nice to say to Him, then I probably shouldn't say anything at all...recognizing that with my bad attitude...if I couldn't ask God nicely for help I should just shut up.

Then my sister suggested I call my godson's family and see if he and his brothers could help.  Great idea!  So I called and his mom answered her cell, "Who?  Hi!  I'm in the hospital, on my way to surgery!"  "What?!"   I quickly hung up and then thought about it some more.  Would it be INCREDIBLY selfish of me to ask to borrow the boys, while she was in surgery?  I mean, technically, they were just sitting at home...doing nothing, right?

Sheepishly, with lots of "I hope your surgery goes well" (which I did!!), I texted my friend, asking if I could take the boys.  She was fine with it.  I called the house, asked if they wanted to help, and ran out to my car.  As soon as I shut the door, huge drops of water began pouring out of a black cloud, I swear riding directly over my head.  From my house...to their house...to Home Depot where we rented a pick-up for an hour...to my house...to the dump with my old furniture...to the store where we loaded up the new stuff.  As I pulled into my drive, the rain miraculously stopped (okay maybe not miraculously) and we brought everything in and dumped it in the middle of my living room.

Finally, at this point my weird-freak out over every little thing-stressed out mood abated and I was able to get over myself and be thankful to the God who provides...even on the days I freak out over every dumb little thing.

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